The establishment of clear and effective agreed ways of working between the client and coach, or a leader and their team or colleagues, serves as a crucial foundation for achieving transformative outcomes. These agreements - which all parties contribute to - outline what is also known as the ‘rules of engagement’ and define expectations and responsibilities of the coach and the client or the leader and team or between colleagues.
In coaching and leading teams, setting agreed ways of working involves the coach asking the client, or the leader asking the team or group asking each other what they need/want to have in place in the partnership to create a psychologically safe place to collaborate and work within to support a successful coaching or working engagement.
In the coaching context, It is an opportunity for the coach to share with the client what coaching is and isn’t and how they work as a coach because each coach will have their own unique way of working. The same principle can apply to leading or being part of a team where the leader or members can discuss and agree what effective leadership is.
In coaching, this process also allows the coach to set expectations and boundaries, explaining what they will and won’t do. Likewise, the client has the opportunity to share their boundaries, and how they best learn, as well as ask questions of the coach to support trust and rapport between parties.
By facilitating, setting and agreeing these parameters at the beginning of the coaching programme (or in support of working together in a team or group), coaches (leaders or group members) can cultivate an environment conducive to growth, trust, vulnerability, openness, and collaboration. These structured ways of working provide a foundation for successful outcomes, ensuring sessions or facilitated conversations are focused, purposeful and aligned with the client's (organisational) goals.
Ultimately, this process not only streamlines the coaching or relationship process, it also supports the coach and client (or leader and team) to partner together within a ‘safe container’ created by and agreed to by all parties to navigate the challenges, unlock potential and realise meaningful personal and professional development.
Below is a broad process of how you might, as a coach or leader, set up ways of working conversation as well as lists of types of questions you may want to ask.
The opening might sound like this:
“To set up our coaching programme/relationship for success, I propose we set-up our agreed ways of working, which means sharing with each other how we want to work together to create a safe place in which you can expand your awareness, new perspectives and ideas.
“These ways of working are created as a partnership and agreed together to support expectations, set boundaries and create clarity about the coaching/working partnership process. It’s also the opportunity for you to ask questions, and share how you best learn and what else might be important for me to know as your coach (leader).
Is that ok with you?” (A closed question to ascertain agreement about setting up the ways of working).
In the opening, you - as the coach - might potentially ask what questions your client (team member or colleague) might have of you, as well as share what coaching (leadership) is from your perspective and broadly how you work.
Next, you might start asking questions to agree on ways of working together. Below are examples of some of those questions, remembering to get curious about your client’s (team’s or colleague's) responses. For example, if you asked what is important to have in place to create a safe or effective place to work together and they said they need to ‘feel safe’ – which is a broad response - you could ask something like: “What needs to be in place in our partnership for you to feel safe?”
In other words, get curious about what your client (team member or colleague) shares with you so that you both specifically know what something they bring into the session/conversation means versus making assumptions about what that something means for the client.
Example questions are:
How do you want me to be, as your coach (leader) to support you on your journey of growth?
What do I need to be aware of about you that is important for me to know? (This question can support revealing information about your client’s culture, learning needs etc)
How would you like me to alert you to things that I notice that I believe might be useful to be aware of?
Are you ok with me using my intuition?
If I feel you are avoiding something that is useful to you, can I bring it to your attention?
How do you learn best?
When you imagine something, do you see pictures or words or something else?
Are you willing to experiment with activities you may not have tried before?
If you feel uncomfortable, how will you (I) know? And when this happens, what do you want to happen to support you?
What areas in your life are you uncomfortable going to?
What other boundaries are important to put into place?
If I step over the boundaries, how will you bring it to my attention?
What would you like me to know about you that may stop you from moving forward? And how can I support you to overcome those barriers?
What else do you need to know about me as your coach (leader)?
Below are some suggestions for coaches to support their intention and role as a coach:
As your coach, my role is to support you in expanding your awareness, so potentially some questions might be challenging and uncomfortable (you might explain the comfort zone or how the mind works here), will it be ok to stretch you in support of you and your goals?
As your coach, I’m listening deeply for your beliefs, habits, emotions that may be empowering or holding you back to support you in expanding your conscious awareness and making new choices and creating new ways of being - versus listening to details that you are already very aware of. When I hear you sharing a lot of details – which you potentially already know consciously – in other words, you will be speaking quickly without hesitation – is it ok to pause you to support you to go ‘underneath the details’ – to understand the deeper story/challenge behind the details? And how best can I stop and pause you?
Possible Boundary statements
What I will not do:
• I will not offer advice
• I will not make you do anything you don’t want to
• I will not do the work for you
What I will do:
• I will ask powerful questions
• I will reflect
• I will listen
• I will use my intuition
• I will be courageous
• I will create a safe space
• I will honour confidentiality
Ways of working agreements are fluid
Setting ways of working for coaches and leaders is the foundation for success, and therefore, should be given time and devotion to ensuring all parties involved are clear about what is important to be put into place to create a safe container to work within. This means all parties are given the opportunity to express their needs and wants and agree to abide by these agreements willingly.
It is also being aware, that as the relationship continues, when things are not working as well as parties would like, then ways of working can be reviewed to identify what might not be clear or perhaps what has been misunderstood (parties may have different understandings of a way of working) or perhaps what is no longer valid and identify what is appropriate and what will support the success of the coaching or leadership or working relationship.
The agreements made can always be amended as change and growth unfold to support the ongoing foundation of trust, safety, rapport, challenge, support, effectiveness and success.
Be empowered.
Jeanine and Marie Empower World Co-founders
The Empower World's world-class Coach Training's next intake starts on 11 Oct 2024 in Doha, Qatar. You can find out more here.
Find out about our upcoming Coach Mentoring Programme starting on 22 November 2024 here.
You can also follow us on:
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/empowerpeopletraining
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/empower_world/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@empower-world1695
You can listen to The Empower World Coaching and Leadership Podcast on the following platforms.
YouTube: https://bit.ly/yt-ew-podcast
Spotify: https://bit.ly/ew-podcast-spotify
iTunes: http://bit.ly/EW-Podcast-iTune
Join our mailing list to receive the latest news and updates from our team.
Don't worry, your information will not be shared.
50% Complete
Receive our bi-weekly blog articles, podcasts and invitations to our events and training's sent straight to your inbox.