Powerful Coaching Doesn’t Require Better Questions - It Requires Strong Connection

This newsletter is inspired by a recent conversation on the Empower World Coaching and Leadership Podcast with Professor Jonathan Passmore, a globally recognised, multi-award-winning thought leader in organisation and people development.

In recent years, coaching has become more visible, more accessible, and more widely adopted than ever before. Digital platforms, scalable programmes, and now AI-enabled tools have opened the door for many more people to experience reflective conversations at work. On the surface, this looks like progress, and in many ways, it is.

Yet beneath this growth sits a quieter question, one that leaders and coaches alike are beginning to wrestle with: If coaching becomes easier to replicate, what actually makes it transformative?

It’s tempting to assume the answer lies in sharper questions, smarter frameworks, or more sophisticated tools. After all, technology can now listen, summarise, and generate thoughtful prompts at speed. 

As Jonathan Passmore, a globally recognised, multi-award-winning thought leader in organisation and people development, observes, AI is “fantastic at listening… gathering information from what’s said, and then turning that back into a summary and an open question.” 

In fact, he notes that it is “as good as most professional coaches” at this technical level. So if questions alone are no longer the differentiator, what is?

Coaching is Not Just Cognitive - It’s Relational

One of the most striking distinctions Jonathan makes is between questions and connections. He reminds us that what changes people is rarely an elegant prompt, but rather, the quality of the human relationship supporting the conversation.

Humour is a powerful example of human interaction and connection. As he puts it, “Humour is something that is a connection between two people.” Not a rehearsed joke, not a clever line, but something relational and situational, emerging from a shared context. 

“It’s often relational… and it’s also situational,” he explains. What lands in one moment, with one person, may mean nothing to anyone else.

This kind of humour - light, human, responsive - is not decoration. It’s data. It tells us something about trust, safety, timing, what might be important to someone, as well as provides for attunement. And it’s something machines, at least for now, simply can't replicate.

Lived Experience Still Matters

Another distinction Jonathan highlights is credibility - not just the credential kind - but the lived kind. AI can scrape the internet for stories, frameworks, and theories, but it does not carry experience in its 'body'. It has not lived through organisational change, leadership pressure, failure, or identity shifts at an emotional or systemic level.

“There is something different,” he says, “when we connect with a human coach who has been… a senior leader, and has lived through the last 3, 5, 25 years in the world of work.” That experience shapes how questions are framed, how silence is held, and how meaning is made in the relational context.

This is particularly relevant for leaders choosing a coach. Often, they are not looking for the right question - they are looking for someone who can understand or relate to the terrain they are navigating.

Identity, Resonance and Trust

Jonathan also speaks to identity as a differentiator; gender, culture, faith, neurodiversity, and life experience all shape how people relate and feel understood. He notes that some reflective partners intentionally choose a coach who shares aspects of their identity because it builds trust and resonance.

Even when the technical skill is identical, “the difference is perceived by the client.” And perception matters, because it shapes safety, openness, and willingness to explore what is truly at stake.

This isn’t about bias or limitation - it’s about acknowledging that coaching is not neutral in impact, even when it strives to be non-directive in method. The relationship itself is part of the process of change because it can allow someone to feel 'safer' to go deeper into curiosity to support greater awareness and new perspectives.

Beyond Thinking: Feeling With

A distinction Jonathan notes is between cognitive empathy and affective empathy. Thinking about how someone feels is not the same as feeling with them.

He says the subtle, human signals we pick up in real time, such as changes in pupils, moisture in the eyes, shifts in skin tone, micro-expressions - don’t just inform the coach intellectually, there is a change for the reflective partner - they often trigger a mirrored emotional response. This shared physiological experience can shape the coach's presence, pacing, and choices in relation to the way they support another, which is uniquely human.

As Jonathan notes plainly: “At the moment, a computer’s not able to replicate.” This supports the requirement for professional coaches who create strong trust, rapport, safety and connection for leaders to navigate complexity, challenges and opportunities.

So, Where Does This Leave Organisations and Coaches?

At Empower World, we recognise AI is here to stay and can support the profession of coaching in numerous ways, but it is not able to replicate the deeper work that coaches can do to support people/leaders. As Jonathan notes, this is not an argument against AI. “AI might be sitting alongside the human coach,” he says. It has a role - particularly for immediacy, accessibility, and moments of reflection when a human coach isn’t available.

But if organisations want coaching to genuinely support growth, resilience, and leadership maturity, they must be intentional about what they are scaling. And if coaches want to remain relevant, they must deepen - not dilute - their humanity.

As Jonathan summarises, if human coaches “focus more on identity, share more of our work experience, bring in more humour, focus more on the emotional aspects of our work, and the values,” we create a fundamentally different kind of conversation.

Reflective Questions

For leaders and organisations:

• Are we investing in coaching tools - or in the quality of coaching relationships?
• What kinds of conversations do we want more of in our culture, and what conditions enable them?

For coaches:

• Which human qualities do I actively cultivate in my practice beyond technique?
• How do I bring my experience, identity, and values into the work without overshadowing the client?

Coaching doesn’t require better questions alone. It needs better connection - and the courage to keep developing what makes us human, even as technology evolves around us.

If this perspective resonates, we invite you to stay curious, reflective, and in conversation with us at Empower World, where depth, humanity, and learning remain at the heart of leadership and coaching development.

Be Empowered

www.empower-world.com

You can hear the full conversation with Podcast guest Jonathan Passmore on the Empower World Coaching and Leadership Podcast Episode 246 - What Makes Coaching Human in an Age of AI via the podcast links below:

YouTube: ------ https://bit.ly/YT-Podcast-EP-246

Direct Link: ---- https://bit.ly/Podcast-EP-246

Spotify: ------- https://bit.ly/SP-Podcast-EP-246

iTunes: -------- https://bit.ly/IT-Podcast-EP-246

Upcoming Empower World Events and Programmes

The Empower World's world-class ICF Approved Professional Coach Training and Leadership Programme for Level 1 starts on 17 April 2026 in Doha, Qatar. You can find out more here.

Coaching Skills Mentoring Programme with an MCC mentor for ICF credentialing purposes, starting 27 March 2026. Find out more about how you can step into masterful coaching here.

The Reignite Coaching Community supports coaches to rebuild confidence, reconnect with their purpose, and return to coaching with clarity and momentum. Through practical resources, peer coaching, expert-led sessions, and a vibrant community, you gain the experience and growth, together with encouragement and feedback to enhance your skills, pursue credentials, and create a thriving, sustainable practice - no matter where you are on your coaching journey, from beginner to highly experienced. Find out more here.

You can also follow us on:

Website: https://www.empower-world.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/empowerpeopletraining

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/empower_world/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@empower-world1695

You can listen to The Empower World Coaching and Leadership Podcast on the following platforms.

YouTube: https://bit.ly/yt-ew-podcast

Spotify: https://bit.ly/ew-podcast-spotify

iTunes: http://bit.ly/EW-Podcast-iTune