Leading with Brave Love: Presence, Boundaries and Courage to Listen

This newsletter is inspired by a recent conversation on the Empower World Coaching and Leadership Podcast with Christy Byerly, MCC.

In today’s fast-moving, high-pressure world, many conversations skim the surface. We talk, respond, solve and move on - often without truly listening to others, and even ourselves. As leaders, coaches and humans, we are expected to be resilient, decisive and supportive, all at once. Yet beneath this expectation, we are navigating complexity, emotional load, busyness and uncertainty, often without the space to pause and truly connect with what matters.

The challenge is rarely a lack of intention. Most people want to lead well, relate well and make a positive difference. The difficulty shows up when conversations become uncomfortable, emotions run high or the stakes feel personal. In those moments, we may default to fixing instead of listening, complying instead of being honest, withdrawing instead of staying present or maybe becoming defensive instead of curious.

Over time, this can dilute trust, reduce clarity and leave us feeling disconnected from our own values and authentic selves. But what if the shift we need is not more effort or expertise - but a different quality of presence?

Brave Love as a Way of Being

This is where the idea of brave love becomes profoundly relevant. Not love as sentiment or niceness, and certainly not love without boundaries. But love as a grounded, discerning and courageous practice incorporating boundaries to support courageous and uncomfortable conversations for the good of all parties.

Brave love can hold clarity, expectations, challenging conversations and care together. It listens beneath the surface. It stays open when conversations feel uncomfortable. And it dares to name what matters, even when doing so feels risky.

As Christy Byerly, Master Certified Coach so beautifully describes it: “Love is a verb… an active daily experience that asks us to be clear, boundaried and brave.”This kind of love transforms coaching and leadership conversations. It invites responsibility rather than dependency. It supports people to reconnect with their inner wisdom and move forward with clarity and confidence.

And it challenges us, as coaches and leaders, to notice our own patterns: where we over-give, avoid, rush or retreat - so we can get curious about our habits, beliefs and experience as well as hold space with greater awareness, presence and integrity.

When Love Feels Hard: Curiosity is the Bridge

There are moments when love is difficult to access - when frustration, fear or judgement might arise. In those moments, curiosity becomes a powerful ally.

As Christy reminds us: "If you can’t love yet, bring a smidge of curiosity. A little curiosity goes further than you know.”

Curiosity can break down resistance. It shifts us from reaction into reflection. It opens space for new awareness - both for ourselves and for those we are in conversation with. Often, curiosity is the way that leads us back to compassion. And from compassion, love naturally grows.

This is not abstract theory. In practice, curiosity can transform the emotional tone of a conversation, reduce defensiveness and invite shared understanding. It also brings a lightness and a reminder that we don’t have to have all the answers, just a genuine willingness to explore.

Listening with the Whole Self

A key part of this work is learning to listen not only with our minds, but with our whole selves. As Christy also shares: "My own body can be my number one friend, and… source of wisdom."

At Empower World, we emphasise the importance of somatic awareness because our bodies often hold information long before our minds make sense of it. Through breath, posture and sensation, we access a deeper intelligence which can support more grounded coaching and clearer leadership.

When we slow down and tune in to ourselves, we notice subtle signals - intuitive insights or awareness that can guide wiser responses. If we are rushing, we tend to overlook the quieter, wise part of ourselves - our whole body and mind - only to realise later that we had ignored what we knew deep down.

This connects closely to the idea of wholeness - bringing all parts of ourselves into our work. Not just the polished or “professional” parts, also the intuitive, creative, questioning, bold, and tender aspects of who we are.

Wholeness allows us to coach and lead with authenticity and courage. It enables us to set boundaries with care, listen deeply, and create spaces where others feel safe to explore their truth.

What Truly Matters

This reflection brings us back to some simple yet powerful foundations of coaching and leadership:

• being present
• trusting what arises
• staying connected to our values
• choosing love - not as a feeling, but as a committed way of being in support of self and others

These are not grand gestures. They are daily practices. Small, intentional shifts that shape the quality of our conversations and the impact we have.

Reflective Questions For You

As you read this, you might like to pause and reflect:

• Where might brave love be asking to show up more fully in my work or relationships right now?
• What would assist me to listen more deeply: to myself, to others, or to what is emerging beneath the surface?
• When love feels difficult, how might a little curiosity shift the energy of a conversation or situation?
• What part of yourself is asking to be welcomed more fully into how you coach or lead?

At Empower World, we encourage your journey as a coach and/or leader to be enriched by embodied, courageous, love-infused coaching.

Be Empowered

www.empower-world.com

You can hear the full conversation with Podcast guest Christi Byerly on the Empower World Coaching and Leadership Podcast Episode 245 - What If Love Isn't Soft - But Rather - Brave, Clear, Transformative? via the podcast links below:

YouTube: ------ https://bit.ly/YT-Podcast-EP-245

Direct Link: ---- https://bit.ly/Podcast-EP-245

Spotify: ------- https://bit.ly/SP-Podcast-EP-245

iTunes: -------- https://bit.ly/IT-Podcast-EP-245

Upcoming Empower World Events and Programmes

The Empower World's world-class ICF Approved Professional Coach Training and Leadership Programme for Level 1 starts on 23 January 2025 in Doha, Qatar. You can find out more here.

Coaching Skills Mentoring Programme with an MCC mentor for ICF credentialing purposes, starting 16 January 2026. Find out more about how you can step into masterful coaching here.

The Reignite Coaching Community supports coaches to rebuild confidence, reconnect with their purpose, and return to coaching with clarity and momentum. Through practical resources, peer coaching, expert-led sessions, and a vibrant community, you gain the experience and growth, together with encouragement and feedback to enhance your skills, pursue credentials, and create a thriving, sustainable practice - no matter where you are on your coaching journey, from beginner to highly experienced. Find out more here.

You can also follow us on:

Website: https://www.empower-world.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/empowerpeopletraining

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/empower_world/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@empower-world1695

You can listen to The Empower World Coaching and Leadership Podcast on the following platforms.

YouTube: https://bit.ly/yt-ew-podcast

Spotify: https://bit.ly/ew-podcast-spotify

iTunes: http://bit.ly/EW-Podcast-iTune