Coaching Starts With Self-Care: The Grounds for Effective Leadership

Coaching skills are leadership skills which can support powerful learning and outcomes for the client (or reflective partner). But what often gets overlooked or pushed aside in the profession of coaching is the role of who the coach is being in their practice in partnership with their client.

Taking care of our 'instrument' - our being as a coach

Coaching isn't just about the processes we use or the presence we offer others, it's also about the presence we hold with ourselves and our own self-care in support of our being, and being the 'instrument' through which we support our reflective partners.

At Empower World, we understand it's not just the doing of coaching; it’s also the being, and taking care of ourselves first and foremost. Before we can authentically attune to someone else, we must be attuned to our own inner experience and our own health and well-being.

When self-attunement is missing, leaders override their own signals in the service of productivity or performance. The result? Disconnection, depletion, and inauthentic interactions that ultimately reduce our effectiveness. 

The cost of constant outward focus is real. Coaches and leaders often push through their own exhaustion to hold space for others, which can lead to burnout, blurred boundaries, and diminished presence.

Self-care practices in service of your client

Inga Bielinska, International Coaching Federation Master Certified Coach and EMCC accredited coaching supervisor says, "If I'm my instrument (as a coach), I really need to show love and care to myself as well, if I really want to do this job effectively."

Inga adds that it is just like the common metaphor used in the coaching and leadership profession: "It's almost like this oxygen mask - put the oxygen mask on yourself before supporting others." And coaching supervision is one way to support our self-care, nurturing and development.

"Supervision can support coaches with really getting connected with themselves, because if we are not connected with ourselves, I don't feel that we do the job to the level we could do," explains Inga.

This can be crucial for entrepreneurs, leaders, and all coaches. Particularly those taking on high levels of responsibility. It can be lonely at the top, juggling many activities.

Inga describes coaching supervision as follows, "The space of reflection when you actually can stop and pause and think about who you are as a coach and how you coach and talk about all the doubts or challenges and successes you experience."

The invitation is to ground our coaching in self-connection. This might look like pausing before a session to notice your breath, checking in with your energy, or even acknowledging what emotions are alive in you. Inga says, "Sometimes it's just a moment - checking in and noticing what's really going on inside of me."

This self-care challenges the cultural myth that effective leadership requires self-sacrifice. The most transformative coaching happens when the leader is well-resourced internally. That means protecting time for reflection, recognising when  depleted and creating space to return to being grounded.

Setting boundaries is also an important way to take care of oneself, not as barriers but as compassionate containers. Healthy boundaries help sustain our capacity to coach with presence and care.

The choice is ours as coaches and leaders to take care of ourselves

The quality of our coaching and leadership is deeply tied to the quality of our inner life. Taking time to reflect - whether that be through coaching supervision, journaling or taking time out to rest and reconnect isn’t a detour from leadership - it’s the path. "This is the work," Inga concludes. "It starts with us."

As leaders and coaches, we must ask: Are we walking alongside others while disconnected from ourselves? Or are we modelling a new way of being - one that honours both self and others, doing and being?

Be Empowered

www.empower-world.com

This newsletter is based on our podcast: Effective Coaching and Leadership Start by Being Present to and Looking After Self. Listen to our full conversation with Inga Bielinska below

YouTube: ------ https://bit.ly/YT-Podcast-EP-229

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Coming up at Empower World: 

Empower World's world-class ICF Approved Professional Coach Training and Leadership Programme's next intake starts on 03 Oct 2025 in Doha, Qatar. You can find out more here.

Coaching Skills Mentoring Programme with an MCC mentor for ICF credentialing purposes, starting 19 September 2025. Find out more here.

The Reignite Coaching Community is a supportive, inspiring space designed to help coaches rebuild confidence, reconnect with their purpose, and return to coaching with clarity and momentum. Through practical resources, peer coaching, expert-led sessions, and a vibrant community, you gain the growth experience, as well as understanding of processes together with encouragement and feedback to enhance your skills, pursue credentials, and create a thriving, sustainable practice - no matter where you are on your journey - from beginner to highly experienced. Find out more here.

You can also follow us on:

Website: https://www.empower-world.com

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You can listen to The Empower World Coaching and Leadership Podcast on the following platforms.

YouTube: https://bit.ly/yt-ew-podcast

Spotify: https://bit.ly/ew-podcast-spotify

iTunes: http://bit.ly/EW-Podcast-iTune