Coaching Agreements: The Gateway to Deep Transformation

In coaching, the agreement is often seen by coaches as a practical step - a necessary piece of structure before “the real work” commences. But when we slow down and bring presence, curiosity, and trust from the outset, the agreement becomes far more than just a formality: it becomes the doorway to profound transformation.

Establishing and maintaining agreements is a foundational coaching competency, which can be interwoven throughout the coaching session at any point - particularly when the goal is shifting and changing - and when embodied fully, can set the tone for the entire session. This way of coaching isn’t about 'ticking a box' - it’s about creating space for clients to connect with what truly matters beneath the surface of their initial topic.

When we invite clients to explore why their chosen focus is important - through open, reflective questions like - “What’s meaningful about this for you?” - we support clients to create greater clarity, alignment, and ownership. This exploration often reveals deeper desires, emotions, values and beliefs. And in doing so, the goal naturally becomes more focused, powerful, resonant and transformational.

This process isn’t rushed. It’s not always linear. The coaching begins the moment we ask, “What would you like to focus on today?” We stay with the client and the unfolding of expanding awareness. Coaches who allow time for this discovery and resist the temptation to ‘get to the outcome’ quickly enable clients to reflect more deeply and articulate what they truly want in their own words.

And when a goal is owned in this way - when it lands with truth and resonance - it becomes an internal compass for the session, guiding the coach, and importantly, the client toward meaningful insight and change.

'Funnelling' to Deeper Meaning

A coach can powerfully deepen a client’s goal by gently funnelling the conversation with layered questions that move from surface-level objectives toward core motivations and values.

Supporting the client to filter down to a deeper, transformative goal is a delicate process. It’s about 'staying with curiosity' and 'following the thread' of the client’s story. By doing this, coaches help clients uncover what’s truly driving them, which may be deeper than what they first express.

For example, when a client shares a goal, the coach’s questions can move from What do you want to achieve? to Why is this important to you? And then, what will achieving this goal mean for your life or who you want to be? This gradual movement creates a pathway for deeper awareness and connection.

In this way, funnelling down to a deeper goal is an expression of the coaching presence, embodying curiosity and openness that supports the client to discover their authentic motivation and inquiry. The client’s goal transforms from a mere objective into a powerful, meaningful intention that fuels engagement and transformation.

In essence, establishing a coaching agreement is not separate from the transformation: it is the beginning of it.

Reflective Questions:

• How present and spacious am I when establishing the session agreement?

• Do I allow the client’s truth to emerge or do I guide them too quickly into an outcome?

• What changes when I listen for what's underneath the initial topic?

• How might I support my client to craft a goal that feels deeply meaningful to them?

True transformation doesn’t begin once the goal is set. It begins in the way we co-create it with presence, patience, and partnership.

Be Empowered.

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 To hear the full conversation with Jeanine Bailey and Marie Quigley, click here.

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Coming up at Empower World:

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